So Excited!

I am counting down the days until my brother's wedding. Three weeks to go, and I have resorted to trying on the turquoise cowgirl boots that I am wearing in the wedding.
I just can't wait!

My Dream Man.

I am tired of being rational. I am tired of history, statistics and memorizing names. College has given me enough of that already. I am ready to dream. I am ready to be a little bit shallow and needy. I am ready to wish on shooting stars and blow on every dandelion I pass. Maybe my dream man isn't out there. Maybe I'll  never meet him, I may never get married either. But I can dream.

My dream man can teach me how to drive stick shift.

My dream man can lift me up with ease and make me feel small.

My dream man has a smile that reaches all the way up to his eyes.

My dream man laughs at my jokes and can joke right along with me.

My dream man is not afraid to dance, even if he's not that good at it.

My dream man can have deep conversations with me about the stars.

My dream man questions the world as much as I do.

My dream man has a sense of humor that isn't just about laughing when something is funny.

My dream man keeps me on my toes and has a good sense of adventure.

My dream man can make me blush.

My dream man holds my hand in public.

My dream man wants four kids someday.

My dream man looks good with scruff.

My dream man doesn't snore.

My dream man likes to sit outside.

My dream man is more competitive than me.

My dream man gets along with my family.

My dream man likes to read.

My dream man wears flipflops at times.

My dream man has pretty eyes.

My dream man can sing and play guitar.

My dream man will kiss me in the rain.

My dream man isn't afraid to be goofy.

My dream man isn't afraid to get his hands dirty.

My dream man is good at sports.

My dream man gets along with my friends.

My dream man eats healthy.


My dream man may not be out there. But I can dream.

Waldorf Window Stars.

My roommate's gone for the weekend. To keep my mind off how much I miss her, I have made myself into the next Martha Stuart. Seriously. The amount of arts and crafts that I have done in the last 24 hours would make her jealous. In the last care package that I got from home, my mom sent me glassy paper that is used to make window stars. So, in an act of lonesomeness, I set out to make our window the most colorful one on campus. Come back roommate- it's getting bad.

Mothers Day.

Hourglass of Worries

I whispered close to my mothers worn features

The marking of age danced before my eyes like wind shaping sand.

I leaned closer to her chest, wrapping my body around her.

Her body was a buoy saving me as I drifted out to sea.

Her hands were sandpaper worn smooth,

Caressing my hair, watching it flow between her short fingers

And slip away- an hourglass of brown and gold.

My tired limbs hug over the side of the rocking chair,

My legs were too long to be tucked between us.

A barricade of appendages now kept me from her womb.

I am afraid I’m not pretty.

There isn’t a garden more vibrant.

The murmur of her level voice warmed me,

A concoction of warm milk and honey.

She rocked forward in the chair.

Comforting me with motion,

She rocked back in the chair.

The aged chair now whined under

The strain of our weight.

I whispered it once again.

Trying to feed off her weak body,

Wondering how she still had strength to bring me relief.

The wisps of hair around her skin cascaded as avalanches of snow.

As I brought my face in, letting my nose unearth her tattered sleeve,

She transformed into the flowery scent that made my childhood bloom

Before my eyes. My belly grew as my childhood wilted away.

I am afraid I won’t have anything to show for my life.

She stopped her rocking to look at my stomach.

Tears drifted from the crow’s feet around her cerulean eyes.

A daughter is enough.

The happiest I have ever been.

It's summer. Last summer to be exact. The sun beats down on my neck. The hot sand between my feet. I am in North Carolina with my two best friends visiting our teacher/friend. We are walking down the beach about to run, hand in hand into the Atlantic ocean for the first time. We run full sprint into the water and I brace myself for the chill of the water. It doesn't come- I have been to the ocean more times but always forced to deal with the freezing waters of the Pacific. This water is bath temperature. As my two best friends stand on either side of us we hold hands the waves crash upon us. They can't take drag us anywhere, we are too strong, the three of us together. The blue skies, the best friends the perfect temperatures. I am laughing and giggling. This is the happiest I have ever been. If I were living in the magical world of Harry Potter and I was forced to make a Patronus charm I would think back to this moment and nothing would be able to touch me.