WARNING: THIS IS NOT LIKE MY USUAL INSIGHTFUL POSTS
So, there was this guy I played Beer Pong with last Saturday at a Frat
(which is conveniently located right down the road from our apartment building.)
P.S. this is not a poem... I just felt like writing in the middle of the page.
Because I am that important.
Anyway, we hit it off right away, we won the game I think.
It's really not important. What IS important is that I put my hand down his pants.
THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK!
No, eww sicko. I did nothing of the sort.
From later stories from the individual himself and several eye-witnesses
I went to pat him on the butt for his great attempt at a shot on one of the last cups of the night...
and my hand found its way into his nickers.
For a quick "Pat-Pat" of sorts.
FOOTBALL PLAYERS DO IT ALL THE TIME... RIGHT?
Anyway.
I was so embarrassed that I would even drunkenly do something so revolting.
That I didn't get to know much more about him.
...
BUT HERE I SIT, ONE WEEK LATER.
truly infatuated with this individual.
What changed? What made me realize that I would put my hands down his pants all over again?
TWO little words.
TWO LITTLE WORDS
With enough power to change over millions of lives.
Start a revolution of followers
Make one a billionare.
And write seven books that have lead me to wanting to live in an alternate universe.
HARRY POTTER.
This guy- the one I grabbed on the tush.
IS MY ULTIMATE HARRY POTTER NERD.
He has a harry Potter Tattoo guys...
How can I not want him to be my best friend??
It is meant to be.
He and I were I.Ming on Facebook.
I will share here with you the lovely conversation we had.
You can be the judge if this friendship is moving too fast.
HIM: Truth of course.
ME: Dear GOD. I take back apologizing for putting my hands down your pants. You sir, may be the coolest guys I know.
HIM: Haha well thank you dear.
(did you hear that? He called me dear??)
ME: No, but seriously. I would do it all over again.
I seriously need to see your room, I have just heard stories...
I am one of the bigger harry potter fans on this planet.
Your house if I may be so bold to ask?
HIM: I am in Gryffindor, might I ask yours?
(Of course he's in Gryffindor...)
ME: Hufflepuff. And not one bit ashamed.
HIM: you shouldnt be. hard work, patience, loyalty and fair play are all highly admirable qualities.
(LIKE O.M.G this guy just listed off the traits of a Hufflepuff!!)
ME: Tis true good Sir. We all can't be Gryffindors, now can we?
HIM: No no we need a balance, tis true.
well next time you come over we shall talk harry potter and I'll show you the marauders map, yule ball invitation, decrees of delores jane umbridege, and my Weasley Wizard Wheezes catalog
(WHHHHHAAATTTTT?????)
ME: I just orgasmed in my brain a little bit. Whoa. You just might be the coolest guy on the planet.
HIM: Hahah Far from it my dear but I promise I can talk Harry Potter with the best of them.
ME: Can we be best friends forever?
SO THE MORAL OF THE STORY FOLKS?
Hannah Muller has found a new best friend.
Have good dreams. I know I will.
But remember- to quote the late Albus Persival Wolfric Brian Dumbledore...
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live."
<3
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